MAY DAY!
I miss Russian tanks running through red square on May Day. I miss Brezhnev eye brows a blazin, scowl a scowlin!. I miss the red scare. I miss communism. I miss propaganda I miss THE DIRTY RED MENACE!.... FLAT OUT
I DO
Wanna fix the worlds economy? that's right. BRING BACK THE SOVIET UNION! everyone will have something collectively to fixate on instead of their massive Visa bill filled with crap lovingly made in China (with poison and lead by slave labor) that they couldn't afford in the first place
I think I write this every year but I miss all of the ballistic missiles on trucks going through red square and the leader being like 50 stories above waving at everyone , while everyone waves back in absolute fear thinking "If I don't wave back its the gulag for my ass! "
they had such cool tanks too. I miss their tanks. Although in recent years they've used them in Georgia in not such a nice way. STILL, its better than what we have now.
it's just not a fun grouping of enemies anymore
For starters we can't even hate China like we should. The normal progression would be lets focus on the next big nation to step up and that nation is china , but like I said earlier they make ALL OF OUR SHIT. and I mean ALL OF IT and now they own all of our mortgages as well. So we can't hate them! THEY OWN US!!!!
so here is a run down of who is out there and how we can/can't hate them
shall we? lets.......
NORTH KOREA?
snore-(th) Korea
Crazy most number one best leader runs country that now has literally a box of wheat thins left in the pantry. Hating North Korea is a waist of time. I do love his most royal highness most exalted leaders hair do though. SO, actually I love north korea and they made this
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ryugyong_Hotel
its so wrong that its SOOOOO right. a festival of poured concrete. I love north korea. Its like the little insanely hateful , totally incapable of trust nation that could.
next......
IRAQ?
nah......that was forced on us. I don't hate Iraq. Never did. Saddam was a douche and could have been taken out without all the Shock and the Awwwwwwwwwwwwwww shit. Iraq is really a low point in us foreign policy history and thats saying A LOT.
IRAN....
Ok so their president doesn't think the holocaust occurred thus making him insane. But still. Iran is fine, I can't really hate them either. I don't have enough reason to hate them. I mean the hostage crisis? come on......thats soooooooooo 1980. It was revolution baby. ITS WAS THE SUMMER OF HATE over there. And we had messed with them so badly since the mid 50's and
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mohammed_Mosaddeq
just unfair what we did to IRAN, we had their hate comin' our way for years.
NEXT........
AL QAEDA
it's not fun hating them.....I mean, where are there? If someone is your enemy can't you just go, find them and have at it? Al Qaeda lurks in the shadows and generally just is a shit enemy. I hate them, sure.....but , whatever. its not that much fun. Some of what they gripe about is right,once again we treated a part of the world like shit and they poked us in the eye BUT..... most of it is F'ing insane though. we can't live in an 11th century world. so.....F them for being SO not fun. they don't even have like cool uniforms or anything fun like a water polo team or ANYTHING.......F THEM!
At least with Russia , we knew where they were, we had lots of spies in each others countries and well.....we knew where they were all the time and if we really needed to , well, shit, we could always play them in hockey or basketball and everyone could go bonkers and yell "U.S.A.......U.S.A"
LEMME SEE AL QAEDA FIELD A BASKETBALL TEAM OR A HOCKEY TEAM!!!!!
yeah, I thought so.
last but not least lumped into one pile
SYRIA, CUBA , SOMOLIA , SUDAN ..........
boring, great music , sad and assholes......all in that order.
even Libya is like almost sort of our friend now.
so, yes............new world order = SHITTY ENEMIES
I know......I say we hate SWITZERLAND! they've been sitting there pretending to be all neutral for too long now. YOU SO KNOW they are full of shit and are taking sides in something. Let's expose them and collectively put all our hate and fear into hating and fearing the swiss? Either that or we can throw our IRE AT THE BELGIANS
I'm GAME! who's in!?!?!
think about it for a minute.
be well,
MOWO!™